Wildlife Wednesday – Peter Who?! – A guest post!

The rabbit is back visiting us on a regular basis – so far he has left the garden alone!  My oldest girl has some thoughts about the bunny’s background – it made me belly laugh!  

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         Hi I’m Peter. Not Peter Cottontail like most people would assume since I’m a bunny. No, I am not a hare, though I hear I look very, very much like a rascal that gave a nice family nightmares…No if I had a carrot for every time a little kid saw me and said…“What’s the bunny’s name?” and then the mother would always say…“That’s Peter Cotton tail honey,” I would be fat like my brother Peter. So please, do me a favour and don’t call me Peter Cottontail, call me by my real name. Peter Radish. That’s my real name.  Now if I had a carrot for every time a kid saw me and said…“What’s the bunny’s name mommy?” And the mother said…“That’s Peter Radish.”, well I’d be skinny like my aunt Peter.

But let me formally introduce myself, Peter Radish. I come from a long line of Peters. It all started with My great, great, great, great, great, great, great, great, great, great, great grandfather carried over twice and so on. Who was named… can you guess? Winford. He didn’t like his name.

Then when he found out his kid number three had two sets of quintuplets he got to work trying to first eat a carrot then think of a perfect name for all of them that would continue through all the generations for the rest of life itself. But due to an unfortunate accident involving a dinosaur he never got the chance so the parents named them all Peter. Not even knowing about the name Peter Cottontail at all!!! But one thing those quintuplets honoured from there grandfather was that all they’re kids would be named the same as them. So they did and then the ice age wiped them all out. But I guess miraculously a bunny managed to write a note to the next generations of bunny’s detailing the “Rule of Peter”. And that’s how it all began.

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It’s a family tradition to name all your kids Peter. And that can get confusing if you know how many kids a bunny might have. It’s especially confusing at family reunions. A normal conversation there might be…

“Peter! I need your help.”

“Why?”

“Ok”

“One sec”

“I can’t right now, I’m helping Peter.”

“Wait who said that? Peter?”

Or….

Everyone’s chatting among themselve’s when one bunny yell’s…

“I’m changing my name to Wolly!!!”

Silence. Everyone turns around and stares.

“Just kidding!” Everyone laughs and continues there conversations while munching their carrot or drinking their carrot punch.

And then my personnel favorite… gossip.

So Peter is telling Peter about life at his house far away in the town across the street.

“So my new job is crazy demanding. I mean, my new boss, Peter, is limiting everybody to five carrots while at work. Of course Peter and I just wouldn’t stand for that. So now we all eat five and a half carrots.”

“You think that’s bad?! Peter just caught the Peter pox. You know the illness that Peter had the other day. Ya, spread it to all the kids, even Peter.”

“Well that’s just horrible.” Interrupts Peter as she continues with her life… “My brother just got promoted to the P’s squad. You know the one that Peter just retired from last year. I can’t even believe the things he made Peter do. They had to cross the border to spy on the Hare’s. They even had to find Peter who was captured. They threatened to take all of his carrots if he didn’t tell them where the safe full of the organic carrots was.”

“Wow that’s horrible.”

“Absolutely horrid!”

“Secret service alright!”

“Ok, everyone knows Peter right?”

“Yes.”

“Yep”

“Know him like a brother!”

“Well he told me that Peter told him that at the carrot fest Peter called him from the garden club that Peter had heared in the bathroom Peter said that I have big ears!”

“The nerve!”

“I know, it’s not my fault! My dad Peter had big ears to.”

“All bunny’s have big ears.”

“Ya, well if you ask me, that guy has a bushy tail.”

Needless to say, it gets confusing, so I look for some peace and quiet from time to time. Gossip can be overwhelming.  I know this nice little place…the deer talk about it at the weekly woods meeting…they call it “The Garden”.  More about that another time, I need to live up to my name and find some radishes.  Yum!

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To be continued

Nightmares about Hares – a “Guest Post” (written by my daughter!!)

Encouraging my children to get involved in our garden has been quite the adventure…  Even though we don’t necessarily take the same lessons out of the garden, it has had an impact on each one of us in one way or another.  This rambling…ahem…memoir…was prepared by my eldest daughter as a “guest blogger” who apparently found our encounters with a very hungry bunny last year very unsettling!  Watching her read, edit and re-word this narrative has once again provided me with yet another special memory of my big girl growing up. This little glimpse into her budding imagination has been a very entertaining (and sometimes humbling) view of a shared event from my child’s perspective, so neat. I hope you enjoy reading this as much as I have!

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The nemesis.

I am not a gardener… but I will help from time to time with watering. Occasionally if I’m in a good mood, I will also help with planting. When I read this blog it brought back some pretty annoying memories. My mother is very big with gardening, meaning me and my other relatives come a close second to her beloved veggie babies. Sometimes she would come from work and she wouldn’t say hi to us or our dad but just stomped towards her garden and violently started to weed. That’s how we knew it was a bad day at work. She takes very good care of her plants and even my “less than inclined gardener” father was on the scene when an unexpected visitor started to make unscheduled appearances.

The bunny.

Can I have some of those garden goodies? Please? I am hungry!

His plan must have been to show up right when my mom was leaving for work so that all she could really do was yell for the little bunny to go away. He just stood on his two paws with his ears up, usually munching on some lettuce, peas or kale. My mom was furious just watching the thing sit there happily munching. We also had other problems as well, such as deer trying to eat our flowers. So the next summer, after my mother spent weeks of planning, shopping and researching, we finally put up our electric fence. It may have kept wild animals partially out but it also kept our dog out as well. He like to eat kale too. We were working in the garden one day when he ran up and got shocked. He shrieked and started to run around the yard in circles yelping. (It won’t actually hurt him though.) So we had succeeded with keeping the dogs out who would sit in the garden eating our kale and the deer when it was actually turned on. (It is my job to make sure it is on at night. I have really bad memory).

So we were set for a while until the little bunny returned. Sometimes we would send the dog in after him but the dog isn’t all that smart and didn’t have a chance of catching the bunny. And in the slim chance that he did, he probably would have no idea what to do with it. So he was usually just our “back up” in those situations but only really succeeded in chasing it away.

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Wouldn’t you be afraid of this face?!

When my dad got in to the action he brought up the idea of just using a paintball gun and shooting the thing to get it moving but was quickly extinguished when my mom thought the idea was crazy. He is from Northern Ontario and used to hunt with his dad. He was astonished when he found out that kids in Nova Scotia didn’t get a week off in the fall to go goose hunting with the whole family. One day my dad walked in the house with a new slingshot from Canadian Tire. He said that it wouldn’t really hurt the bunny, just get it to go away. He asked me and my sister to fill up a red bucket full of small rocks. By the time he actually hit the bunny – after many, many, many attempts – he simply jumped up in the air landed back on the ground and continued his business eating. Later on in the year the slingshot broke and we just had to accept the that was life and in life there are bunnies. So if you ever had a bunny don’t try to hurt it or scare it away you just have to accept that he’s there and you’re helping him live. It’s not like he can eat all your garden in one day. Or you can just get a dog. Either way embrace the fact that your garden is so great that you even attract nightmares of hares!

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It does look pretty tempting!

– Ally Griffin (not my real name!)