Wildlife Wednesday – The Showdown at “The Garden”

In this Wildlife Wednesday post there will be three different perspectives.  A deer’s perspective as he runs away from my dog.  My dog’s perspective as he runs after the deer.  And my perspective as I watch it all happen.

#1 perspective (The deer)

  All I wanted was to munch on some vegetables with my buddies.  It was a nice day and I didn’t feel like going back to the tree den until later.  My wife was all up in my face about making sure the kids were ready for life and all my kids did was whine.  So me and my buddies all decided to go to the hot spot everyone liked to call “The Garden.”  We ran as fast as we could to the hot spot after a hard day at work (eating and finding grass).  The longer I took the more upset my wife would be so I went pretty quick, so did all the other guys.  We got to “the Garden” and everyone was told to vote who they thought would have to check to see if the electric fence was on.  (I did it last time)  But when we got there apparently a dinner special was going on because some of those little annoying humans were looking and pointing at us and were throwing delicious apples to us.  All the guys and me ran towards all that we could get.  And then it happened.  We heard a door open, and then saw a little white dog.  All the guys ran.  I, however, didn’t.  It was my night!  I didn’t want it to be ruined!  A scary story my great aunt deer had once told me about “Gus the guard dog”  had become a famous story throughout the woods and I changed my mind and ran.  “Gus the guard dog” was the beast of the woods that everyone was terrified to run into.  I had heard at the monthly woods meating that Stormin Norman (Pheasant) had almost been captured.  He said that Gus breathed anger .  His ears were apparently a secret weapon that all humans falled for.  Cuteness was his best acting scheme.  Unfortunately I hadn’t ran fast enough and that beast was right at my tail.  I leapt into the kind shelter of the woods where I disappeared from his view.  My wife is going to be mad but luckily I managed to keep and apple in my mouth, I will give it to her   That will smooth things over for sure.

#2 perspective  (The dog)

Instinct is everything.  Well at least to dogs.  All I know is that if there was an animal you could catch, go for it.  So that’s what I did.  There was an animal.  I am a dog.  My instinct kicked in and I ran.  My feet practically flew as I sprinted for the deer.  I am a small white dog.  And I am not ferocious but I am cute.  And that is a great weapon to have.  My ears and fur usually win me some kind of treat but I really don’t care one way or another, I eat almost everything.  Expect tomatoes.  Those little red balls are not natural looking.  And they are so sour.  So I don’t eat them, but that’s my life choice.  Around the subdivision I am notorious with the animals for being dashingly handsome and brave.  And ferocious.  In MY house I am known for being cute and cuddly and always being curled up on my couch.  I choose to keep my “woods life” and my “house life” separate.  My routine is sleep, eat, sleep, look for something to chew, sleep and then ask my friend Ally (not her real name) to let me outside to pee.  So one day I needed to pee so she let me out.  I saw deer.  So then I sprinted after them. Most of them sprinted and one started a little later than the others giving me a chance to catch him.  I ran as hard as my big “muscle covered” legs would take me.  I couldn’t catch him but I almost did!  That’s what matters.  (If anyone asks I did catch that deer.)

#3 perspective (My perspective)

It was a nice day.  I looked out the window and saw some deer.  I love deer!  I ran and grabbed some apples.  The kind I did’t like, of course.  I am a very picky eater when it comes to apples.  No to green but yes to yellow.  Not the gross kind of red apples and not if they are too squishy. Best to toss them in the compost or, in this case, throw them to the deer.  We started to throw.  The deer went for them right away.  Our dog Gus, a cute little cuddly dog that everyone loves somehow go out and ran.  I started yelling, trying to stop him, but his instincts had already turned on and his ears had already turned off.  He ran.  But I knew he wouldn’t catch him, even if he did he wouldn’t know what to do with a deer except lick it.  So I watched him chase the deer.  He eventually came back and then I gave him a treat but not a Tomato because I know he doesn’t like them.

~ Ally Griffin (not my real name)